Is It Over Before It's Even Begun?

Well I had hoped by the time I blogged again I would be injury free and running again and a smile planted back on my face.  Sadly, it's not the case.  Anyone who is a runner or triathlete will probably understand my woes.  Everyone else just thinks I'm mad.  I most probably am.  I've been reasonably lucky with injuries over the years and have very rarely missed a session but this one has really got me down.  Not being able to run in the glorious weather we've been having, when I've been in a real need to de-stress and with the looming Ironman - I've been miserable and not much fun to be around.  Ask my husband, he will vouch for that!

Arranman?  Well, maybe it's over before it's even begun.  Someone once told me the hardest part was getting to the start line.  And they were maybe right.  Running up to 85 miles per week, cycling or spinning 4 times plus upping swimming to 4/5 times per week and much longer distances was bound to take it's toll on my body.  But I felt good!  I felt strong!  I was cross training, nutritionally fuelled and doing yoga.  I maybe didn't allow enough rest for my body to recover.  Resting and tapering I find difficult but I need to learn to do it or I maybe wouldn't be in this problem!

Nutritional fuel - After a hilly 70 mile cycle around Kintyre I rewarded myself with my fave Sunday brunch - avocado and eggs on toast -  yum!

But here I am, injured and feeling sorry for myself.  I hit a new low last Friday (my favourite day of the week where I usually slow down training with some light spinning, swimming and yoga) but everything just seemed to be going wrong.  My leg ached.  I knew I should rest and I hated missing my morning swim.  I couldn't sleep.  The bathroom we were getting re-done was lying unfinished for visitors.  The car was broken and no idea when it was getting fixed.  The house was a mess.  Work was chaotic with assessments and end of year budget orders incomplete.  I had to pull out of the Balloch half marathon at the weekend as the injury just wasn't improving.  I just couldn't cheer myself up on Friday so I completely apologise and want to sorry if you are one of the friends, family or colleagues who have had to deal with Mrs Self Pity or receive my pestering messages asking for help!  You know who you are!  But regardless of how small my problems are compared to a lot in this world, I want to thank you all for your friendly words of support and advice - you all have been great and lent a sympathetic ear when I needed it.  And given me hope!  Everyone gets injured at times, I know that.  But they rest, work through it and come out the other side stronger.  Like I am going to.  I will use alternative ways to keep up fitness levels and train without injuring myself further.  

My workouts for the week have including rolling about on a tennis ball and a foam roller - ouch

I gave total rest a go for a few days and mentally it was horrible so from the advice of the Dr and other experts I've seen, cycling and swimming can continue.  I've loved being out on my bike and back in the pool, managing to tally up over 100 miles on the bike despite a few rest days and another open water swim in the Loch with Jen!  I'm starting to feel human again and even managed to crack a smile at the weekend :-)  This was mainly because I got to meet wee baby Maddison who is just super duper cute!  And some of my friends were home so it was fantastic to catch up.  And my husband got a fantastic PB at the Balloch to Clydebank half marathon.  He never fails to put in a good performance and I am so proud of him.  But right now I'm just incredibly jealous that he is running!

Meeting wee Maddison put a smile on my face - what a wee cutie!

To get running fit again, I've been working hard to stretch, foam roll, tennis ball and ice every day as well as attending sports massages and hopefully physio soon.  I tried an easy run on Tuesday but was disappointed that it was still painful, so I'm going to give aqua-jogging a go instead.  I will report back on that........ I'm dubious at best but willing to try anything.

My cat Charlie isn't best impressed with the tennis ball or foam roller either!

This injury will not defeat me.  I know my husband and Mum would love me just to quit with the Ironman triathlon.  Maybe I will. If I have t, I will.  I would rather just be running again for the enjoyment of it, pain free again.  But I still hope to do it if I can.  I KNOW I can do it, I am not giving up hope just yet.  Watch this space.

The Mental Side of Injuries

Dunaverty at it's finest on a Tuesday night (30mile cycle)

Just as I thought my training for my first, and only, Ironman was going well - I get injured.  Out of the blue and I can't really pin point what caused it or even what it is!  I have a pain down my whole left side - neck, shoulder, hip, ITB, hamstring, calf and heel.  It's predominantly sore at the hamstring/glutes and I finally had to give in after an 8 mile excruciatingly painful (and slow) run after the Strathaven Half Marathon and have a few rest days.  Rest from running anyway much to my dislike!  Most sensible people would just take the rest and move on but not me, I worry!  I should've looked at it positively, the weather was perfect last week - bright blue skies and little wind.  Therefore, I got out on my bike!  I saw the beautiful Kintyre countryside and managed to rack up over 100 miles during the week as well as a few hours on the turbo/spin.  

However, my head was in turmoil!  I felt like I was going insane.  Most people surely would just go "Hey, I'm sore, I'm going to take some rest".  Not me.  I fretted and worried and googled and worried even more.  "What if I have to stop training?", "What if I've damaged my hip permanently?" and worse "What if I'll never run pain free again?"  Thoughts of not even taking part in the Ironman were in my head and depressing me!  The thought of people out running in the beautiful weather was making me really sad.  So much so that my long-suffering husband took pity on me to go a few walks to try to keep me sane and active (no pain as I walk).

Perfect for my 1st OW swim of the year

As well as upping my mileage in the pool I even got a wonderful open water swim at Machrihanish Pans Bay.  I was staying in the Ugadale Cottages with some of my best friends and it was the perfect opportunity for a wee dip before a hot stones massage and a lovely meal at the Old Clubhouse (the enchiladas and the chocolate oreo brownie were delicious!)   We had such a fantastic time together too - catching up with friends and drinking french martinis is what life is all about isn't it?  Anyway, it certainly stopped me from thinking too much about my injury.  The weather was simply too nice to stop me from running over the weekend (stupid maybe, I know) so I did a slow 15 miler with Jocelyn, Katie and Jennifer at Ballochair forestry and on Sunday a wee 3 miles beach trot in the morning before breakfast.  Mentally, this gave me a huge boost.  I felt happy that I could do it despite some pain and slowness.  At least I could still run!  But I wanted to get better.  Hearing the news about my husband's fantastic performance at the Scottish XC Championship gave me a further boost but also made me jealous - I want to run!!

We enjoyed some pampering at the 'Girls Night In' at Ugadale

If I couldn't run far at least I could cycle.  So back on the bike on Sunday and managed my target of 50 miles in about 3 hours 45.  Pretty slow but enjoyable and good craic with the others.  But I'm a complete disaster as just on my final 100m to the house I couldn't get it into gear, chain came off and I fell to the side scraping my elbows, side and knees.  Muppet!  Blood all down me, I trudged home with my bike, limping with my sore leg.  What a sight!!  But I soon perked up - we were going to Muneroy for cake and a walk with family along Carskiey beach which was fabulous and they cheered me up no end.  

Sunday cycles and chat

Carskiey Beach for family walks

I know I've got to be positive, goodness, there are a lot worse things going on in the world than having a sore leg! I know that but I find it hard.  Training and running makes me happy.  It releases stress and gives me the feel good factor I crave.  It's my routine.  I love the outdoors and I love running.  And it makes me feel better if I allow myself an odd treat at Muneroy!  Some of you might be able to understand but I realise that some of you think I'm just mental!  Nevertheless, I'm hoping to get running again (pain free soon).  I've taken a little rest.  I've did some yoga.  I've cross trained.  I've had some sports massages, stretched, foam rolled and visited an Osteopath.  So here's hoping that I'm on the mend. :-)

The treats at Muneroy are only small............